Spent about 4 hours getting a bike fit today. I'm not sure how I feel. I mean, I feel a bit better because homeboy straightened out my apparently crooked hips, adjusted my cleats saddle and handlebars. but...

okay. I feel like I was only afforded these services gratis because of my gender. & I dont really know how to feel about it. I'm sure you know this about me, but I'm not the type of person that thinks having genitals entitles me to manipulate people into giving me what I want. I use my titties for good, never for evil.
excuse me.

but seriously. okay. So I was given this service, several hundred dollars worth of service. because I'm a touring cyclist? Sure. If I was just some yahoo on a hooptey rollin in asking for that kind of service, I'm sure I'd be out of luck. But as a touring cyclist, spectacular tits or no, even if I was a grizzled old roadie, suffering from excruciating knee pain, I think they would have helped me adjust some things to get me on my way. But I don't think I would have gotten the same level of analytical fitting. And I don't think buddy would have referred to my crotch as 'the playground'.
(um. really. He told me not to tilt my saddle too far up, or I might hurt 'the playground'. That did make me laugh, though)
other evidence? well, he was definitely looking down my shirt when I was on the trainer. I think I would have done the same though, honestly, so I guess I'm not too upset.
oh, we did this thing to loosen my hips where he pulled at my knees and I had to try to close them. He said something like, "close your legs! Don't let that bad guy in there!"
I was straining pretty hard at the time, but I still remember thinking, "wait, what?"
Oh, and when one of his employees came in, he said, "watch out for this guy".
I made some noncommital noise. He said, "did you hear me?" as in, I'm not joking, this guy is going to give you trouble, you vulnerable and accessible girl you. The guy in question, though pretty douchey seeming, didnt say a word to me.
the mechanic who tuned up my bike was really awesome and did zero leering. yay.

Okay, now: Did I do the wrong thing by accepting a service that I perceived to be given to me based on my gender? Was I wrong for not saying anything about it? The guy's intentions WERE altruistic. He did a lot for me and got nothing in return. I really needed the service, and I couldnt pay what would be asked. I did go into the shop seeking the service, knowing I couldnt pay. What did I expect? And also, it's not like he propositioned me or anything. Made a few jokes. what's the big deal?

Maybe I'm feeling guilty because I feel I subconsciously expected this treatment, even though maybe based on my cycling goals and achievements rather than my 'playground'.

I don't want to be lumped in with those miserable harpies who go to bars and cackle as they manipulate a bunch a chumps they care nothing about into buying drinks for them all night.

I did really need this service. Would have I have refused the donation of time if I had been financially well off? I dont think so.

I would also like to mention: other than the slightly sexist comments, I didnt get the sense that he or any of the other mechanics talked down to me. Often at shops mechanics or technicians are eager to make themselves look good by making me (or anyone) feel stupid. Nothing discussed about my suffering was related to my ineptitude, and my posture wasnt nitpicked too hard. Critical points were discussed and politely corrected (keep your heels down, dont grip your bars, relax your elbows) though my positive traits were also noted but not in a patronizingly over congratulatory way. My maintenancing wasnt sneered at. Out of the many things that need to be tweaked (which were tweaked without mentioning), buddy only brought up the one that makes safety an issue, and required extra parts. we fixed it. (brake pads, I couldnt get them out of the shoes. we used vice grips and a hammer. I had the replacement pads on me already)
So, in this respect, I can definitely say I did NOT feel discriminated against, cause it's pretty common for mechanics to just finger wag and go "UM. UGH. DID YOU KNOW YOUR X Y AND Z IS FUCKED UP? DO YOU EVEN KNOW HOW TO RIDE A BIKE?" making me feel icky and defensive. Usually if I express so much as a preference in products it must be because I just dont know how to use them. being a girl and all. duh.

blah
Welcome to the exhausting world of over analyzation.

I'm going to go back in to the shop before I leave town, to see if the exercises he gave me to do have been effective in straightening my hips.
wish me speedy knee recovery.
and like, smash the patriarchy, dude.